Enneagram Stereotype - Type 3's are deceitful
Type 3 seems to get a bad rap because of their chameleon-like ability to take on the identity valued by whatever group they're trying to become a part of. Two points I'd like to make about this:
- The position that this is deceitful doesn't take into account the type 3 perspective.
- Being yourself doesn't require that you be the same person in all situations and circumstances.
To take on an identity valued by the group, all you need to do is dress the part, walk the walk, and talk the talk. When in a corporate environment, put on the suit and play the executive. When on a construction site, make sure you scuff up the new tools so that you don't look like a rookie. Each group has their own way of talking, acting and thinking.
It doesn't feel like deceit when you look around, see what the situation calls for and simply adapt to fit in. It's an important skill to learn when going for job interviews, getting along with people, and generally learning how to sell yourself in order to get where you want to go in life.
However, some people are of the belief that you have to remain authentic in some way - that by simply adapting your self-presentation to better fit the situation you find yourself in or the people you find yourself with means that you're somehow selling out your true self and being deceitful. There are times when you may want to be true to your own individuality and other times when you may need to fit in with the collective.
With all that said, the danger comes in when self-presentation goes beyond reality (e.g., misrepresenting your capabilities and background), that's where the deceitfulness can appear. Presenting yourself in a good light is not in itself deceitful, it's going too far with it that's deceitful.
